Her head swung toward the door as she heard the latch click open. It seemed an infernal length of time for the door to swing open by the time it did her blush had spread across her chest.
“Oh my, Miss Charlotte. Did you fall?” Came the almost shrill voice of Alice her young house-maid. She did not see her, but instead had fixed her eyes on the sight of Samuel standing in the doorway. He cut a dashing figure in his charcoal grey pin-stripped trousers and his green waistcoat and black tail coat. He filled his clothing well giving an air of wealth and desire.
Samuel stepped forward. “May I assist you in Standing Mrs. Mendel?”
“Yes, Mr. Rider that would be kind of you” Charlotte replied.
Samuel stepped around the piles of fabric of her skirts. He bent and she could feel his warm breath near her ear. He placed one hand under her elbow. Causing him to lean forward she could see from the position of his head he was noticing the cut of her bodice. She could feel warmth growing again in her skin this time focused on her exposed collar bones. It was a blush of excitement.
“Oh Miss I will make some tea to help revive you,” Alice spoke quickly exiting before Charlotte could be put on her feet.
Laying her on the divan “Charlotte, I think we should post pone our picnic and stay in instead.” added Samuel.
Charlotte sat up
Samuel laughed looking both relieved and relaxed at the same time. “Charlotte, You must always call me Samuel when we are alone. I cannot have it any other way. For I am most fond of you candor, directness and honesty.”

I like the immediate ease portrayed in their relationship. Intimate without being awkward. Good job.
ReplyDeleteI also like your descriptions of the dress. it has definitely taken on a role of its own and I will be slightly sad to see it retired.
This is a good piece. Liking the flow of it.
ReplyDelete"she next placed a hand on the small of her back." I think you meant, "he next placed a hand..."
"Here knee not working..." you meant, "Her knee not working..."
"...not used to being demure and proper around the opposite sex." I am not sure that they even thought like this back then...saying, "the opposite sex." I could be wrong, but I haven't heard this to be the case in all the literature I've encountered from this era.
I absolutely love her response, "Mr. Rider, I had not fallen I was getting used to..." it is very funny. Love it.
Really hoping you would work on this and help us get to know this Mr. Rider some more!
Thanks for catching the typos.
ReplyDeleteI am not consciously trying to keep thin all in the language of the day. Their conversation as much as possible but the rest not so much. I have not read my Bronte, Carroll, Doyle, or Dickens recently enough. I keep trying to channel Austen but that is about 100 years too early.